Horoscope

My Rob Breszny horoscope this week is extremely apt!

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Congrats, Gemini! You have not only weathered your recent phase of relentless novelty; you've thrived on the adjustments it demanded of you. I am hereby awarding you with the rare and prestigious title of Change-Lover, which I only bestow upon one of the signs of the zodiac every four years or so. So what's next on the schedule? The shock of the new will soon subside, giving you a chance to more fully integrate the fresh approaches you've been adopting. I suggest you relax your hyper-vigilance and slip into a slower, smoother, more reflective groove.

Watch Out for Ghosts

I'm always amused and fascinated by obscure signage, especially the ones that try to convey a message without using any words. This one really takes the cake! I found it on Flickr:

"A sign for ghosts outside Niedzica Castle, Poland... The ghost, known as the "White Lady", is the ghost of Umina, from the Inca's royal family, married to Sebastian Brezevichy, one of the previous owners of the castle. Umina was murdered in front of the castle from a treasure hunter who wanted to find the Inca's treasure that, according to the tradition, brought with her from South America. Her father hid the treasure and made a cryptic document which, till now, nobody can interpret it."

May Somebody Melt Some Lead Into Satan's Ear

In my household, we're very superstitious about knocking on wood. It's not so surprising in my case, since I'm kind of a big flake, but you wouldn't expect someone like Guy to be superstitious; he's otherwise so coldly logical.

However, once I did a little research, it all made a lot more sense. When Guy utters something that seems to be tempting fate--then looks wildly around the room for a piece of wood to knock on, unable to rest until he's done so--he's not really being illogical at all. He's simply letting the wood spirits know he is there. That's just plain good sense:

"The phrase is used by people who rap their knuckles on a piece of wood hoping to stave off bad luck. In the UK the phrase 'touch wood is used - often jokingly by tapping one's head. The derivation may be the association that wood and trees have with good spirits in mythology, or with the Christian cross. It used to be considered good luck to tap trees to let the wood spirits within know you were there. Traditions of this sort still persist in Ireland."

Wikipedia offers this comprehensive tour of knocking on wood around the world:

In Belgium (Flanders), they say: "hout vasthouden", which would translate as "touching or holding wood". If possible when saying this, they touch a table or door or something else made of wood.

In Denmark, "bank under bordet" (knock under the table) is a commonly used phrase, which is often used as a part of the phrase "7-9-13, bank under bordet", where "7-9-13" is just another way to say touch wood.

In Germany, the version "auf Holz klopfen" (knock on wood) can be accompanied by the phrase "Toi, toi, toi" (probably derived from the Old German word for 'Devil' or from other traditions of spitting over your left shoulder three times for the purpose of warding off the Devil) which is still used as a charm to ward off evil or as a good luck charm for thespians out of superstition that wishing an actor good luck brings the opposite.

In France, "toucher du bois" is used with the exact same meaning.

In Italy, a similar superstition exists, it's said "Toccare ferro" and the meaning is similar: one must touch metal, preferably iron.

In Netherlands, the term "afkloppen" (knock off), is used, sometimes accompanied by "op ongeverfd hout" (on unpainted wood).

In Norway, the term "bank i bordet" ("knock the table" or rather: "knock the wooden board" ('bordet' is an ambiguity)), is used. In Norway, it is also sometimes used to stress that you're telling the truth (akin to saying "I swear to god that...").

In Poland, the version of this charm is "odpukać w niemalowane" [knocking on unpainted (wood)]. As the name of the charm suggests, the charm only works if one knocks on unpainted wood.

In Portugal, the version, which has a similar meaning to the others all around the world, is called "bater na madeira", and when someone does this, "lagarto, lagarto, lagarto" (lizard) is uttered.

In Switzerland, the Swiss German version is "Holz alange" (touch wood) – but while saying it, knocking on or tapping wood is still required. A simple touch is not enough.

In Sweden, the phrase "ta i trä" (touch wood) is commonly used as a part of the phrase "peppar peppar, ta i trä" (pepper pepper, touch wood), the double "pepper" also being used to ward off a temptation of fate. It's often shortened to just saying "peppar peppar" while knocking on wood.

In Turkey, "tahtaya vur" (knock on wood) is used. Usually, someone else will answer: "Şeytan kulağına kurşun" (May somebody melt some lead into Satan's ear).

In India, it's said as "Nazar Na Lage" (let there be no evil eye), and in Hindi, the meaning is similar. It is used when something seems too good, like saying "touch wood"; it's said as "Kannu pada Pooguthu" (let there be no evil eye), in Tamil.

In United States, It's predated by a much more popular and more meaningful saying "Stomp on Wood" which was used in the early 1800s. It was said to originate from early settlers when they would stomp the floor in their log cabins to avoid bad luck. The saying "Knocking on Wood" was recorded only after the early 1900s.

Vampire Killing Kit

It's almost Halloween (yes, in our household, this holiday is respectfully observed for a solid two months), and at this time of year, thoughts naturally turn to vampires: namely, how can we protect ourselves from them? If you're like me, you've been buying extra bulbs of garlic at PCC and stringing them into festive garlands, sharpening your wooden stakes, polishing your silver dagger, and the like.

Here's a great time-saving tip. Why not put all your vampire killing accessories in one place so you won't have to waste time every year wondering where you misplaced that giant wooden crucifix or vial of holy water? This year, when vampires are slavering at your door, all you have to do is reach for your handy vampire killing kit to satisfy all your vampire killing related needs.

It's fairly easy to assemble one of these on your own. But if you have some extra cash lying around, it's even easier to buy one ready-made (like the one pictured here):

"A complete and authentic vampire killing kit — made around 1800 and complete with stakes, mirrors, a gun with silver bullets, crosses, a Bible, holy water, candles and even garlic, all housed in a American walnut case with a carved cross on top — attained $14,850 in the Jimmy Pippen estate sale by Stevens October 3–4 in the new Natchez Convention Center."

I recommend you buy the oldest kit you can afford. It's similar to wine, these things just get better with age.

If you truly can't afford a vampire killing kit of any description, why not at least treat yourself to Ben & Jerry's seasonal flavor, Vampire Vanilla (available only in the month of October)? It's a rich vanilla mixed with tiny chocolate-covered pretzel crosses and generous swirls of whole garlic cloves. Each pint is personally blessed by a Catholic priest. Eat a bowl of this ice-cream, and watch as vampires (along with everyone else) quickly make themselves scarce!

Quotation and photo from www.antiquetrader.com, November 11, 2008

Superstitions

"In many cultures, bad luck and even death are associated with certain numbers. People of the United States, for example, think that 13 is an unlucky number. Most U.S. American hotels do not have a thirteenth floor, and even a hotel number ending in 13 may be refused. Friday the thirteenth is perceived as an unlucky day. Many U.S. persons will not schedule important events such as weddings or major surgery on this day. The Chinese, who also believe that good or bad luck is associated with certain numbers, feel that four is the most negative number because it sounds like their word for death. Hotels in China, Hong Kong, and Taiwan often have no fourth floor, and some Asian airports have no Gate 4. Conversely, some numbers have positive mean­ings in China. For example, the number six represents happiness and nine represents long life. The number of people in a photograph also has significance. Many Chinese believe that having an uneven number of people in a photograph will bring bad luck and that having three people in a photograph will result in dire consequences—the middle person will die (Dresser, 1996).Those who take pictures as mementos for their Chinese business friends should keep this in mind."

From Global Social Customs and Business Etiquette